Sisterhood of the travelling thoughts...

Its a Thursday night on the eve of a long weekend and I'm sitting at my desk at work.  I just got off the phone with my Bestie who in this last week has been working 18 hour days away from home and her kids to open up another one of her string of very successful stores whilst still juggling her other business. Another friend is busy writing a paper that she's presenting at a scientific conference on the weekend whilst marking a multitude of papers; another is leaving for the US in the morning to consult on a project, after having organised her life, her son and her husband for the week she is away; another is busy studying for exams whilst busy with her PhD and juggling project work and writing a proposal; another is a mother who is busy with a combination of dinner, friends, pets, children and a kiddies party tomorrow ... having come home after a long day at work...and the list goes on and on which includes you and and all the women you know...

All these busy, successful, hard working, amazing women got me thinking, about how us as women in our multiple roles stay inspired and motivated to keep doing what we do, how we manage to stay in the game with smiles on our faces and hands ready to catch whatever is thrown at us.  Whether its snot, projectile vomit, a budget, a proposal, an extra meeting, a friend in need, a sick parent, a stinky nappy....we are always there.  But what makes YOU tick?  I will tell you what makes me tick.  Its this.  Its knowing that I have a sisterhood of women that are pretty much, in whatever shape or form, probably going through, or have gone through or will go through what I'm going through right now.  I think apart from everything else that physiologically identifies me with another woman (size of hips apart!), this is what often keeps me going when times are tough. Do you ever have those light bulb moments, when in a flash, you suddenly have that moment of clarity and you feel like you are on top of the world and just "get it".  I live for those moments and I just had one whilst sitting here (hold the phone!!).  My light bulb moment tonight was the idea of sisterhood and how sharing thoughts and ideas amongst people that understand can make you stronger, keep you motivated, positive and a part of something so special its hard to even define. 

Men just don't get it, and no disrespect.  Peace out to you guys (and if you are still reading my blog after the last 2 paragraphs, BIG UP!).  I think I can safely say that men really are from Mars and women from Venus.  Part of this sisterhood is our ability, and yes I call it an ability, to vent...to be the ventee and ventor (yes, I just made that up...deal with it!).  Now what men don't understand is that a true vent is probably one of the most satisfying things you can do.  And no (if you are still reading, martian man) I am not talking about an air vent, I am talking about those let it all out moments when you don't necessarily know how or want to fix what you need to talk about, but you just wanna let it all out.  And boy do we know how to let it all out....there is nothing, and I mean nothing, like a good vent.  Cup of coffee or wine in hand, whether its with a friend or friends, it doesn't matter. After the vent, with your friend sympathising how bad your job is, and how unfair your husband is, or how bratty your children are, you know what the best thing is?  The unwavering support.  The "I will be there for you if all this does go to pot" the "I understand" and the sharing of thoughts and ideas about how to view something or think about something.  I thinks its just as important to be the ventor...being able to listen and sympathise and share thoughts and have someone really hear what you are saying.  I always come away from these interactions with friends feeling good, sorted in my head, a more balanced view of looking at whatever was bothering me, or a feeling that I was able to offer support to someone that needed to talk.  And therein lies the beauty of our sisterhood, and therein lies part of what makes us able to do what we do. 

I think something else that makes us special is a joint pride in women that are successful. I'm not saying we are not competitive, because we are, but I feel inspired by women who are truly "doing it for themselves".  I take such intense pride in seeing women working hard to get healthy, women being amazing mothers and career-women and all the while sharing thoughts, ideas, support, care....basically bits of themselves that they don't want back.

So I leave you with this thought.  Go out and conquer.  Because you can.  And if you don't manage this time, you know a girls' got your back.  So feel inspired, beautiful and special and make your friends feel it too.  Its the beauty of this blog.  These thoughts travel.

With all that said...

Always yours in love handles (slowly diminishing...but more on that next week!) :)

xx

What the fat!?!

Picture this.  Two overweight women go to a restaurant for lunch.  They order cuppacinos with cream.  For lunch they have steak, with a blob of butter on top.  They have a side salad instead of the fries, but ask for full fat mayonnaise. The waiter is looking at them with that expression that I now know very well.  That look that says...don't you know fat makes fat?  Why would an overweight person order cream? And butter? Surely that is a heart attack waiting to happen?

Well, not too long ago, that is how I thought too, and millions of other people with me.  Fat makes fat my Mom and Grandma used to say, so it was skim milk and fat free cheese (which by the way was so hard you could barely chew it) and fat free yoghurt, cream on special occasions only, red meat only once a week.  Fat was the enemy, carbs your friend, you name it, wholewheat bread, breakfast cereal, muesli, pasta, potatoes, rice, porridge....and all this thinking supported by that wonderful food triangle with the basis of your diet firmly rooted amongst the carbs (and big business making millions with each mouthful).  With that said, and no disrespect to my dear Mom and those millions of people who have been taught that this is the way to eat and to care for your family, that kind of diet is just plain toxic. 

Why do you ask?  How can you make that claim?  Well, I'm going to give you the heads up.  Because a revolution is coming. Scientists, nutritionists and dieticians all over the world are heralding the call for a change in the way we see nutrition.  Famous scientists and health professionals are revoking previous advice and cautioning people to open their minds to this revolution.  The revolution is Low Carb High Fat (LCHF).  It means you eat less carbs along with a higher proportion of fat. It means minimizing your intake of sugar and starches. Doing this means that you get to eat delicious food and don't calorie-count and lose weight! In fact, LCHF makes it easier to lose weight and to control your blood sugar too (further information on the science is available on www.dietdoctor.com and www.lifezone.se ).

Whilst I'm no scientist, nutritionist or dietician, I am someone that has struggled with their weight for as long as I can remember, someone that suffers with insulin resistance because of polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) and someone that has become disillusioned with diet after diet and nothing seems to work.  So hungry on a low calorie diet that it felt like my stomach was a black hole.  Experiencing those agonising moments when stepping onto the scale not wanting to look down at the numbers because of being so scared that they are not going to be less.  And then they are not less.  But that was then and this is now. Out with the old and in with the new! Conventional, tried and trusted methods and collective "wisdom" have just made things worse and not better, so I say, "why the fat stick with that"?

As I said in my last blog, I'm not a believer in a quick fix.  I believe that your health takes lots of hard work and that to truly see lasting results you need to change your lifestyle.  LCHF has made me a believer again.  A believer in me and that my body can change and that I can be fit and I can be healthy and feel fantastic.  And I can tell you, person to person, this is the most important of all.  Self belief, confidence and a healthy body image are all attainable goals and I intend on reaching those goals. 

I will share my progress on a weekly basis and hope to be, no WILL BE the proof that all the skeptics can put in their puddings, and eat! So there!

Yours in love handles,
xx

I've discovered in my almost-35 years that most of us want what we don't have, or can't have.  Give a girl a head of beautiful straight hair...guaranteed she wants curls.....blondes want to have dark or red hair (yep folks that was me......and the word "patchy"does not even begin to describe the look that was then hidden for weeks under a hat), brunettes or red-heads want blonde hair....curvaceous girls want to be plankish skinny and the skinny ones would prefer a little meat...and the list just continues ad nauseam.

What is amazing to me though, through lots of introspection and careful human study (!) is that body image and self image is a constantly changing thing and once we think we have what we wanted all along, well its onto the next thing, and most times, that one dream that we always wanted is pretty much unattainable.  I say this because I am using myself as a human research subject here.  You see, I'm the classic pear shape with a bit more pear than stalk if you know what I mean....and trust me when I tell you that I've pretty much struggled all my life to just be a plank.  No boobs, hips and butt would suit me down to the ground. I imagine myself waking up and being able to throw on a pair of tights without snagging the elastic around a bump, or deciding whether the waist band should go above or below the belly button because "my stomach feels thinner today".  Yes I admit all this and I have to laugh at myself because as skinny as I ever become, this is my shape and its not gonna change, not even if every bit of cellulite gets sucked out via Dr Rey's fancy lipo machine. Sigh. And yet....I feel like I have gained a certain wisdom of late, something about being accepting of what you cannot change, and that those that can, DO. 

So, with renewed energy to change what I can, I decided that I needed to change my life.  It all started with a proposal.  It was called #POA which very plainly stands for Plan Of Action, and it was really a few pages that I wrote with some motivation for myself and 4 friends who really wanted to start to live a healthier life by losing weight, exercising and eating better.  So we started in January this year and #POA I'm happy to report is doing great.  We have a BBM group and we arrange our exercise times, we try to work out as much as we can whilst juggling work, school, kids, husbands, partners, being women and just LIFE in general.  I'm not going to lie, its not always easy to make sure you eat right after a long day, or making that effort to get up at the crack of dawn to work out, but it WORKS and 4 months on, we have all lost weight and are fitter and feel fantastic.  Its really the first time that we feel like this is becoming a way of life and that is what makes it sustainable.  Its not a quick fix, but seriously, I think quick fixes are overrated (just the way quickies are!).  This way I get to spend quality time with people I love and on top of that I decided to write a blog about life and the joy of love handles and share thoughts and ideas about losing weight, living a healthier life and overcoming challenges to become the people we want to be, not the body we want to be.  The old adage of better brains than brawn, makes a late comeback to a standing ovation!

Am I going to be the next bikini model? Hell no.  Too many stretch marks for that, and you know what? Its ok.  I want to teach my daughter that you need to have attainable goals, work with what you have, celebrate who you are and stop being your own judge, jury and executioner.  I have wasted way too much time in my life trying to squeeze into a size 10 when I could have been having stimulating conversation with a friend.   

So, with that said....till next time....I look forward to lots more sharing.  After all.... Barney says sharing is caring.........and who is this Pear to argue with a purple dinosaur? #Nuffsaid.

Yours in lovehandles
xx